The Post Trauma Life and Its Definition

I was thinking recently and talking to someone regarding why I moved from my previous career choice into something different.  And this VERY valid realization hit me.  One of the biggest reasons I changed careers was not wanting to add a few piercings to my ears (my previous career choice was extremely conservative) and not because people had VERY strict rules on who I could date (and potentially either find or lose employment) but because my TRAUMA CHANGED ME.

There we go, the real reason I decided to pull the gun and leave my previous field was that those traumatic events had altered my perception of who I am, how I wanted to live my life, who I want to spend my time with, and basically everything about that version of me.

That person no longer exists and trust me I have mourned that person and then some.  That version of me is not valid in any sense of the word and is most definitely not the person I am today, in this present moment.  And it was weird, as a feeling of calm washed over me, I realized that I also didn't care whether or not people liked me anymore or even understood me.  That person doesn’t exist anymore not to say there aren’t little bits left (but only the things that I needed to take with me).

So now, I am defining what my version of post trauma life means (you can take it or leave it).

Post-trauma life (noun) - indicates the life you decide to build for yourself after experiencing or undergoing a traumatic life altering event or events.  You get to decide who holds you, touches you, and essentially becomes part of your life.  You are now completely in charge of your healing, recovery, and establishing boundaries and bond with people you now feel safe with.  You can end relationships that honour the new place and the new chapter that you are.